Process of Illumination

Gifts of the Gayatri Mantra?

This Tuesday I had planned to go to StudioBe and write my blog in the morning and then attend my first painting class of the season in the afternoon. When I arrived at StudioBe I set up my computer, lit the candles and incense and went to turn on some inspiring background music (chants, of course). When I opened my iPhone to select the tracks that I wanted to listen to, I suddenly had an urge to chant a mantra before starting to write. 

This was the second day in a row that this had happened. The day before (the final full, super moon of a series this summer), I arrived at StudioBe and felt compelled to chant the Gayatri Mantra. I selected a version of the mantra by Deva Premal from my music library and proceeded to chant along with her. When the chant was over, I fell into a deep, spontaneous meditation for almost an hour. To my recollection, it was the deepest I have gone into meditation since the Puerto Vallarta retreat in February.

The interesting thing is that I had not planned to chant or to meditate that day… I had “stuff” I needed to do. However, when I got to StudioBe, everything on my “to do” list got shoved to the side. It did not even feel like I made a decision about it…it just “happened”.

And it was the same thing yesterday. I had planned to write my blog that morning but before I did, I had an urge to chant, once again. This time, though, I felt like I wanted to find a “theme” for my chanting. Because I was about to write my blog, I googled “mantras for creativity”. I was amazed when the first search results showed… you guessed it… The Gayatri Mantra, once again.

“Hmmm”, I thought. “I guess this is the mantra I’m supposed to be chanting right now.” So, I decided to look for other recordings that included all 108 repetitions of the Gayatri Mantra. What I found was a BEAUTIFUL YouTube video featuring a famous Dutch chant master named Hein Braat. I followed along with him for a while and was so moved by the tone and energy of his version that I had to stop and learn more about him. I found a site where I could download some free versions of his chants including the Gayatri Mantra, Om Mane Padme Hum, the Maha Mrityunjaya Mantra, Om Nama Shivaya and more. When I was done researching him and downloading, I decided to finish my chanting with the same Deva Premal version I had used the day before.

Once again, when I was finished the chant, I fell into another deep, spontaneous meditation. My body was literally vibrating and, at the same time, I was incredibly relaxed… almost paralyzed with relaxation. It felt like there was nowhere to go but within, and I simply let myself sink into the deliciousness of it.

I was there for quite some time when I began to feel the presence of one of my spirit guides, Horatio. I don’t think I’ve written much, if anything,  about my spirit guides so I’ll have to save that story for another post but, for now, let’s just say that, yes… I do have three spirit guides who have introduced themselves to me as Horatio, Seth & Ka-Rachel. I came to know their presence in my life about 11 years ago and there was a time, early on, when I began to experiment with channeling. I’ll explain more about what that is in a moment.

So, here I was, in deep meditation when I felt Horatio’s presence and “heard” his name in my mind. This was a bit of a surprise to me because I have not thought much about my guides lately and have not channeled in years. However, I was in such an open and receptive place and it felt so natural to go and get my notebook and let Horatio speak through me.

For those of you who don’t know what channeling is, you can read more about it here. However, in my own experience, what I have come to believe is that channeling is, quite simply, a much clearer and more personally relevant way of gaining deep wisdom and finding answers to my most challenging questions. Many people, myself included, have found it helpful to consult tarot cards, astrology, psychics, etc. as a means of seeking “higher” guidance on their journey. In my experience, this has been quite beneficial and yet, I always came away feeling as if I was merely asking for this outside guidance because I was in need of confirmation and validation of what I already knew or felt, deep inside. Perhaps I had not been conscious of it until that point, or I had been resisting a difficult truth, but I definitely got the sense that, on some level, I already “knew” the answer, as soon I heard it from the other source. When it happens spontaneously, this is what many people define as an “A-HA” moment: That brief flash of recognition when your conscious mind finally catches up with what your soul or “higher self” has known all along.

For years, I consulted these other sources, again and again, Even when I began to channel, years ago, and I read the incredible insight and wisdom that my so-called “guides” had for me, I was still skeptical. After all, I am just an ordinary human being. Why should I expect that this kind of information would be available through me? I wasn’t that special, was I? But the information did seem right-on and was fairly indisputable, in my mind, especially when I would pull out the pages and read them months or years later… I was blown away by how accurate they were. Still, I didn’t want to fully believe it, just in case I was wrong… or crazy. I felt more comfortable consulting other mediums which I had more faith in. The funny thing is that, over the years, I had more than one psychic or channeler tell me that I was a also a channeler but, for whatever reason, I still wasn’t ready to step into it. I guess I had more work to do.

It wasn’t until quite recently when my friend, Jamie, reminded me that I need to start trusting my own intuitive gifts, that I felt something shift. He has told me, more than once, that he is surprised that I still rely on tarot cards and other divination “tools” rather than simply consulting my own divinity or “higher self”. And, for some reason, this time I was ready to hear it. From that last conversation we had a couple of months ago, till now, I have not used any of those “tools”. I set my intention to allow my own inner guidance to come forth and to trust it. Since the labour day chanting retreat at Omega, I have felt that I have been receiving an energetic “upgrade”. I’m not exactly sure how to explain or even understand what is happening, but I am more convinced that ever that, whatever it is, it is a significant part of my journey toward Self-Love, wholeness and authenticity. It seems clear to me now that, for a long time, I have resisted embracing how deep and vast my intuitive ability is and opening StudioBe was a choice that truly seems to have been guided by my soul. Since I moved in there, I am wide open and in the flow. That space is my spiritual and creative muse. I can’t explain it much better than that.

So, here, I will now share what I channeled from Horatio that day. I’m doing so because it feels like that is the reason the information came when it did… on a full moon day and on a day and time when I was supposed to be writing my blog. I’m also sharing it because I strongly believe that we all have the gift of intuition and “in-sight”… the only variable is whether we love and accept ourselves enough to trust it and step into it.

Please feel free to comment or ask questions. I’ve never shared anything like this publicly before, so please be mindful of my vulnerability in that regard. It is very personal and, at the same time, an important part of my journey to share it with you.


“Many moons and many travels have taken you on a journey toward your soul.
You have brought much joy to many people in the unfolding of your story and your willingness to share it with others.

Be that as it may, you are just now beginning to accept the purpose that you were given, in this life that you chose, in order to fulfill your passion for growth and adventure.

What is it that keeps you reminded of old memories and regrets? It is the whole nature of the process of clearing out what you no longer need. How can you be sure that it no longer serves you unless you take it out, look at it and try it on the “new” you? You will be surprised at how it just doesn’t “fit” anymore.

But you long for it to fit in a new way. To repurpose it somehow. That has always been your softest spot – to be loyal and to love what has loved you… FOREVER… and repurposing it is your way of honoring what it has meant to you. There are things that you will just never get rid of, for that reason, and this is a lovely quality you have and one that your sons will one day come to fully appreciate about you. You are one in a million and it is proper for you to sometimes fear that what you hold on to might not be in your best interests. But, here is the thing: You are magnificent in your power to enjoy your life. You have developed such a strong vision for the future and yet you are so willing to allow the unfoldment of new and unexpected tragedies to become joyful occurrences because you are willing to learn from them. Don’t be distracted by how far you think you haven’t come. Be in the joy of knowing that this is all part of a luscious plan to get you out of your head and into your heart, where you will remain for all eternity.

If you are thinking of publishing this to your blog which, by the way, we have been thrilled to watch unfold and to be the guidance that you have chosen to follow in these years since we have spoken. We know you are on a journey that includes everyone you come into contact with and we are ready to participate in the unfoldment of our “process of illumination”, just as you are with yours – (That’s a joke).

So, whenever you are open to receiving the blessing of channel from us, we hope that you will be guided to receive it in such a way as to retreat into silence, as you have done today, with the invocation of the Gayatri Mantra and meditation. This is the ideal way for you to hear us and your own inner voice as one.

Your friend, Jamie, is a very wise soul and we are grateful for his guidance to you to follow your own inner intuition and that you are wise enough, at this point, to follow it. Paying attention to the other forms of divination is fine but there is often so much confusion when one listens to different voices from so many structures of spirit that it can often lead to a sense of “stuckness”. Better to tune into your own clear channel, if you have one, which you most certainly do. All the information is the same – the only difference is that it is easy to misinterpret another form because it is not speaking your “language” and “dialect”, you see?

And you have known, for some time, that whatever guidance you are given is simply a confirmation of what you already know. Yes, at times, the information is not what you want to hear in that moment and so it serves to ignite a reaction from you. Yes, it is real and true and you may trust it – but only in that exact moment is it accurate and so the reaction which the information ignites in you serves to cause you to realign, once again, with what you want and your own truth about what you believe. It can be uncomfortable and tiresome and cause you to chase your own tail for a bit – and that has it’s value as long as you believe that this is the path you must travel toward enlightenment. But we say there is a more direct path that is available to you and you need only choose it and follow it. We will help you.”

[At this point, I began to notice that the “voice” of Horatio sounded different and familiar at the same time. I asked who was speaking.]

“We are Abraham, Horatio, Ka-Rachel & Seth.”

[What? Abraham? The same Abraham that Esther Hicks channels?]

“Yes, that’s right :)”

[Hmmm… sure does sound like Abraham… don’t know if I fully believe that, but… whatever…]

“Awareness gives you so many gifts and you are now able to manifest one that you have been doubting for some time. The gift of clear sight into yourself. Your Truth, vision, purpose, pay-off…”


“Yes, pay-off.

You chose Mastery as your word for this year and yet part of you didn’t trust that it would actually manifest. And yet it has, in so many ways. Don’t be fooled about what Mastery actually is. It is not the ability to “Master” everything you do. It is what you use when you apply it to what you want to manifest. It is what is available to you when you trust yourself enough to proceed in a way that is masterful, artful, compassionate and kind. When all hearts are connected and all minds are focused on the one…the one-ness…the truth of what is.

Remember to preach the gospel of truth – in your words: “Be Authentic”. That is your gospel and that is how you reach people with your truth – to simply show it. Be it and be humble to it. It has all the answers and will provide all the guidance necessary for an abundant life. Even fear is authentic. It should be praised for being so… and then acknowledged… and then processed… and then let go. All of it is truth and pushing it away only perpetuates the thoughts which keep us trapped in our separateness. Be the love you want to attract and all will be well.

Yes, it is a tumultuous world and now is a time when the seas must part to reveal the solid ground below. This metaphor is not unfamiliar, as when Moses parted the Red Sea – But what does it mean? It means divide your emotions and walk through them. Yes, they are there and will always return but you must be masterful when dealing with them. Yes, they are signals from the brain, which alert you to what needs to be looked at but then you must apply your mastery to them, acknowledge them, move them aside and walk on the solid ground beneath them on your way to freedom.

Those who drowned in the Red Sea where not able to trust that this division of the emotions was possible. Those who believe that emotions are the truth are doomed to stay trapped in them. Emotions are not the truth. They are a tool which will lead you to the truth, but only if you go beneath them. And the truth leads to safety and, therefore, freedom.

You are tired and we will go.

Fashion yourself a wonderful BE, Bee, Being.

[What does that mean?}

Yes, the bees that have been attracted to you are significant and we are thrilled that you noticed. They are the sustaining force of this planet and want you to know that they are here for you – not to harm you. We are all one.


— Abraham, Horatio, Seth & Ka-Rachel – Tuesday September 9, 2014